Share this joke via Email (Step 2)
Share this Joke on Twitter
Registered Users Only
Registered Users Only
Get link for other Social Networks
- Home
- Popular Jokes
- New Releases
- Joke of the Day
- Browse By Category
- Browse Writers
- Contests
- Submit Joke
- Contact Us
- Info
All rights reserved.
Sex Jokes - Bestiality Jokes
Oh Baby!
A young lady in the maternity ward just prior to labor is asked by the midwife if she would like her husband to be present at the birth. "I'm afraid I don't have a husband" she replies.
"O.K. do you have a boyfriend?" asks the midwife.
"No, no boyfriend either."
"Do you have a partner then?"
"No, I'm unattached, I'll be having my baby on my own."
After the birth the midwife again speaks to the young woman. "You have a healthy bouncing baby girl, but I must warn you before you see her that the baby is black."
"Well," replies the girl. "I was very down on my luck, with no money and nowhere to live, and so I accepted a job in a porno movie. The lead man was black."
"Oh, I'm very sorry," says the midwife. "That's really none of my business and I'm sorry that I have to ask you these awkward questions, but I must also tell you that the baby has blonde hair."
"Well yes," the girl again replies. "You see I desperately needed the money and there was this Swedish guy also involved in the movie. What else could I do?"
"Oh, I'm sorry," the midwife repeats. "That's really none of my business and I hate to pry further but your baby also has slanted eyes."
"Well yes," continues the girl. "I was incredibly hard up and there was a little Chinese man also in the movie. I really had no choice."
At this the midwife again apologizes, collects the baby, and presents her to the girl, who immediately proceeds to give baby a slap on the bum. The baby starts crying and the mother exclaims, "Thank God for that!"
"What do you mean?" says the midwife, shocked.
WIth a sigh of relief, the mother says, "I had this horrible feeling that it was going to bark!"
- 1
- 4
- 2
Man Wandering in the Desert
A man is riding aimlessly through the desert on a donkey. He is not hungry or thirsty, because he has a bottomless bowl of fruit. He wanders for about a week and eventually gets pretty horny. He gets to the point where he can't stand it anymore. So he decides to try and have sex with the donkey. He drops his pants and positions himself under the donkey. But, to his dismay, the donkey walks away. Only slightly discouraged, the man decides to try again. He walks to where the donkey is standing, positions himself under the donkey, and right before he goes for it, the donkey walks away again. Now the man is getting frustrated. As he prepares for his third and final try, he sees a vision. A beautiful, naked woman appears out of nowhere. She approaches the stunned man, who until recently, believed that he was the only person for hundreds of miles. She smiles at him and says, ''I would do anything for that bowl of fruit you have." ''Anything?'' he says, getting fairly excited. ''Yes, anything.'' she replies. So he says, ''Will you hold the donkey!?''
- 0
- 2
- 0
Little Red Riding Hood
Little Red Riding Hood was walking through the woods on her way to visit her grandmother, when suddenly The Big Bad Wolf jumped out from behind a tree. "Ah-ha....!" The Big Bad Wolf said, "Now I've got you and I'm going to eat you! EAT! EAT! EAT!" Little Red Riding Hood said angrily, "Damn it, doesn't anybody simply fuck anymore?"
- 2
- 6
- 4
