You Might Be A Redneck

You might be a redneck if...

• You think Old Yeller is a movie about your brother's tooth.
• You watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.
• Your secret family recipe is illegal.
• Your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve.
• Your baby's favorite teething ring is the garden hose in the yard.
• Your coat-of-arms features kudzu.
• Your sophisticated show-biz cousin is a rodeo clown.
• You think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.
• Your best ashtray is a turtle shell.
• Your pocketknife has ever been referred to as Exhibit A.

Redneck Check Up

A redneck felt sick and decided to go to the doctor. The doctor examined him. "I can't seem to find the problem, but I think it has something to do with alcohol." "Well," said the redneck, "then I'll come back when you're sober.'

Redneck Taxidermist

You might be a redneck if... You owe a taxidermist more than your annual income.