Iowa Tractor Stop

Q: What do you call a bunch of tractors parked in front of a McDonald's on Friday night in Iowa?
A: Prom.

Souped Up Lincoln

A rich guy from the north is driving his Lincoln Continental down to New Orleans. Along the way he picks up a redneck.
The redneck looks quizzically at the dash board and says, "What aret hose thangs?"
The driver says, "Those are golf tees."
The redneck asks, "What those are for?"
The driver says "Those hold  my balls when I drive."
The redneck says, "Sheeit, these Lincolns sure come with everythang!"

What You Do Best!

This suave-looking Redneck, (okay, just pretend there is one) walks into a bar and sees a cute little rich girl who's had too much to drink. He says to her, "Hey, baby...whataya say we go back to your place and get it on! Lost in her drink, she replies "Sure, why not!" They get to her place, and she lies on the bed and says, "Okay, show me what you do best!" Without delay, the Redneck rips off his jacket, grabs her T.V., VCR, and purse and runs out the door!