Ebonics 101

Welcome to EBONICS 101
Herein follow a few terms to help you get started on your merry way towards the ve-nak-u-lar...
"Damn- that shit is DOPE!" - That is a wonderful concept/object/action.
"Can't FADE that." - I am unable to comprehend or assimilate that concept at this time.
"Shante ain't havin' it." - This is not something that Shante will allow to occur.
"Homey- Boo was dropping PHAT beats." - Our friend Boo was playing some wonderful music.
"YO!- Let me GAFFLE that BLUNT!" - Might I be able to indulge in your marijuana cigarette?
"JIMMY was on and I was HITTIN' it!" - I had in my possession a condom, which was used in my engagement of sexual activity.
"What's up? Why you ALL UP in my shit!?!" - Please sir/madam- stay out of my affairs.
"She is HELLA' CLOWIN' you HOMEY!" - The woman is creatively informing you that her interest in dating you is non-existent at this time.
"Woooooo- Renaldo was PITCHIN' STRAIGHT GAME to baby-doll, and it was SMOOOOVE!" - Renaldo was creatively inquiring as to the marital status of the female, with the intention of asking her on a date.
"STEP OFF Cool- before I bust PHAT CAPS in your A** with my NEINER..." - It would be beneficial to your physical state to leave this area, as I will soon be encouraged by your disrespect towards me to shoot bullets into your buttocks with my 9mm pistol.
"Why is 5-OH always BUGGIN'!?!" - Why are the police officers always worried?
"Friday night- COLD CHILLIN' with a 40 and a BLUNT." - It is Friday eve, and I am leisurely enjoying a forty ounce bottle of malt liquor and a marijuana cigarette.

Darker Skin Meaning

They said the darker you were, you know, you were further away from the slave house. I learned that! The light-skinned people, they say, there was some mixing going on. Man, my family was so dark, we were two feet from freedom! We didn't even know there was a house on the plantation.

An Economist's Speech

The following is supposedly a true story;
An economist was about to give a presentation in Washington, DC on the problems with Black-Scholes model of option pricing and was expecting no more than a dozen of government officials attending. To his amazement, when he arrived, the room was packed with edgy, tough-looking guys in shades. Still, after five or so minutes into the presentation all of them stood up and left without a word. The economist found out only later that his secretary ran the presentation through a spell-checker and what was "The Problem with Black-Scholes" became "The Problem with Black Schools".