Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman: "It's in the phone book."
Man: "But I don't know your name."
Woman: "That's in the phone book too."
Man: "I'd really like to get into your pants."
Woman: "No thanks. There's already one asshole in there."
Under a Rock
Man: "So, wanna go back to my place?"
Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"
I'd Love To But... (Pt III)
More goofy excuses you can use to get out of going somewhere you just don't wanna go to. I'D LOVE TO BUT:
- I have to go to court for kitty littering.
- I have to jog my memory.
- I have to knit some dust bunnies for a charity bazaar.
- I have to rotate my crops.
- I have to sit up with a sick ant.
- I have to stay home and see if I snore.
- I have to study for a blood test.
- I have to thaw some karate chops for dinner.
- I prefer to remain an enigma.
- I think you want the OTHER (fill in your name here).
- I'm going to be old someday.
- I'm going to count the bristles in my toothbrush.
- I'm going to the Missing Persons Bureau to see if anyone is looking for me.
- I'm having my baby shoes bronzed.
- I'm trying to cut down.
- I'm up to my eardrums in waxy buildup.
- I've been traded to Cincinnati.
- My Dress For Obscurity class meets then.
- Mmy favorite commercial is on TV.
- My uncle escaped... again.
- Oooo, having fun gives me prickly heat.
Pick up Return
And here's one including the correct snappy return.
Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
Woman: "Unfertilized, fuck off!"