Just A Memory

Two very elderly ladies were enjoying the sunshine on a park bench in Miami. They had been meeting in that park every sunny day, for over 12 years, chatting and enjoying each others friendship. One day, the younger of the two ladies, turns to the other and says, "Please don't be angry with me dear, but I am embarrassed. After all these years, what is your name? I am trying to remember, but I just can't. "The older friend stares at her, looking very distressed, says nothing for two full minutes, and finally with tearful eyes, says..."How soon do you have to know?"

On The Porch

Two elderly people are rocking on the porch at the home. "Bet you can't guess how old I am," he says. "Bet I can," she says. "Bet you fifty dollars you can't tell me how old I am," he says. "You're on," she says. "Stand up." He stands up. She looks him up and she looks him down. "Now turn around," she says. She looks him up and she looks him down. "Now, turn back around . . . and drop your pants," she says. He drops his pants and she looks him up . . . and she looks him down . . . "you're 86," she says. He's dumbounded. "By golly, woman, you're right. I am 86. How'd you know?" She rocks and smiles. "You told me yesterday!"

Name Game

An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen.
The two elderly gentlemen were talking, and one said, "Last night we went out to a new restaurant, and it was really great. I really recommend it." The other man said, "What's the name of the restaurant?" The first man knits his brow in obvious concentration and finally says to his companion, "Ah, what is the name of that red flower you give to someone you love?"
His friend replies, "A Carnation?" "No. No. The other one," the man says. His friend offers another suggestion, "The Poppy?"
"No," growls the man, "You know the one that is red and has thorns." His friend says, "Do you mean a rose?" "Yes, yes that's it," the first man says. He then turns toward the kitchen and yells, "Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?"