What Smells Like A Woman?

Q: What is green, has four legs and smells like a woman?
A: The white house's pool table

Witch to Believe

A guy embezzled money from his company and was about to jump off a bridge, when an old hag appeared and told him she was a witch, and would put the money back if he would sleep with her. He did, and was ready to go back to work, believing his problems were solved, when the old hag who was in bed smoking a cigarette asked him, “Sonny, aren’t you too old to believe in witches?”

Fight Competition

The shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand new business much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST DEALS. He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading LOWEST PRICES. The shopkeeper was panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop-it read... Main entrance.