Refused Rejection

Baxter Conners, Vice President
Company 203
203 Wall St.
New York, NY 10015
Dear Mr. Conners,
Thank you for your letter of February 17th. After careful consideration, I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me employment with your bank.  This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually large number of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field of candidates it is impossible for me to accept all refusals.  Despite Company 203's outstanding qualifications and previous experience in rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet my needs at this time. Therefore I will initiate employment with your firm immediately following graduation. I look forward to seeing you then.
Sincerely,
John Smith

Knock Knock - Lion

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Lion!
Lion who?
Lion down on the job again!

Kiss at a Christmas Party

Boss: Who said that just because I tried to kiss you at last month's Christmas party, you could neglect to do your work around here?
Secretary: My lawyer.