Tax Refund

I know you're missin' the beach but you're missin' a tooth and all the tread on your tires too. Let's make a smart decision this year with your tax refund.

Dollars Equals Cents

Theorem: 1$ = 1c. Proof: And another that gives you a sense of money disappearing. 1$ = 100c= (10c)^2= (0.1$)^2= 0.01$= 1c.
Here $ means dollars and c means cents. This one is scary in that I have seen PhD's in math who were unable to see what was wrong with this one. Actually I am crossposting this to sci.physics because I think that the latter makes a very nice introduction to the importance of keeping track of your dimensions.

Like a Million Bucks

You have a face like a million dollars... All green and wrinkled!