Norman and Barry

Norman and  Barry got married in California. They couldn't afford a honeymoon so they went back to Norman's Mom and Dad's house for their first married night together. In the morning, Little Johnny, Norman's little brother, gets up and has his breakfast.
As he is going out of the door to go to school, he asks his mom if Norman and Barry are up yet. She replies, 'No'. Little Johnny asks, 'Do you know what I think?' His mom replies, 'I don't want to hear what you think! Just go to  school.'
Little Johnny comes home for lunch and asks  his mom, 'Are Norman and Barry up yet?' She replies, 'No.' Johnny  says, 'Do you know what I think?' 
His mom replies, 'Never mind what you think! Eat your lunch and go back to school' 
After school, Little Johnny comes home and asks again, 'Are Norman and Barry up yet?' His mom says, 'No.' He asks, 'Do you know what I think?' His mom replies, 'OK, now tell me what you think.' He says: 'Last night Norman came to my room for the Vaseline and I think I gave him my airplane glue.'

Little Johnny to Tinkle

Little Johnny says to his mother, "Mommy, I have to go and tinkle." The mother replies back, "Would you like Mommy to take you?" Little Johnny says, "No let grandma... her hand shakes!"

Sneaky Kid

Little Johnny likes to gamble. One day, his dad gets a new job, so his family has to move to a new city. Johnny's dad thinks, "I'll get a head start on Johnny's gambling." He calls the teacher and says, "My son Johnny will be starting your class tomorrow, but he likes to gamble, so you'll have to keep an eye on him." The teacher says, "Okay," because she can handle it. The next day, Johnny walks into class and hands the teacher an apple and says, "Hi, my name is Johnny." She says, "Yes, I know who you are." Johnny smiles and says, "I bet you $10 you've got a mole on your butt." The teacher thinks that she will break his little gambling problem, so she takes him up on the bet. She pulls her pants down, shows him her butt, and there is no mole. That afternoon, Johnny goes home and tells his dad that he lost $10 to the teacher and explains why. His dad calls the teacher and says, "Johnny said that he bet you that you had a mole on your butt and he lost." The teacher says, "Yeah, and I think I broke his gambling problem." Johnny's dad laughs and says, "No you didn't, he bet me $100 this morning that he'd see your ass before the day was over."