Little Johnny Catching Parents

Just as mom walks though the door, little Johnny comes running over. He says ''Mommy, Mommy. I was playing in daddy's closet and he came in with the lady next door and they started kissing and then they took off each others clothes and laid down on the bed...'" The mother interrupts him. ''Stop right there!! Wait 'till daddy comes home!!'' When the father finally returns from work, mother promptly goes up to him and says ''I'm leaving you.''
The father, bewildered, slowly asks ''Why!?! What did I do??''
The mother turns to Johnny and says, ''Tell daddy exactly what you told me today!'' ''I was playing in daddy's closet and he came in with the lady next door and they started kissing and then they took each other's clothes off and laid down on the bed... just like what you and Uncle Joe did last summer.''

Little Johnny Catches His Parents

Little Johnny catches his parents going at it. He yells in, "Hey, Pop! What are you doing?" His father says, "Son, I'm filling your mother's tank." Johnny says, "Oh, yeah? Well, you better get a model that gets better mileage. The postman filled her this morning."

Jump Two Feet

Little Johnny goes into a pharmacy and asks the chemist for some rubbers. The chemist puts a pack of rubbers on the counter. Johnny looks at the rubbers and asks the chemist if he has any other kind. The chemist goes into the back and brings out another pack. "Nah," says Johnny, "what else do you have?" "Well," the chemist replies, "the only other kind that I have are the ones with all the bumps and ridges on them. Do you know what these will do to a woman?" Little Johnny says, "No... but they'll make a goat jump about two feet off of the ground!"