Johnny Needs to Pee

While the teacher was conducting her class, Little Johnny yells out, "Teacher, teacher, I have to take a piss." The teacher, shocked, replies "No, Johnny you may not because you did not raise your hand. And I will speak to your mother for using that word." So Little Johnny raises his hand and says, "Teacher, teacher, I have to pee!" The teacher turns and says to Little Johnny, the word is 'urinate' and you may not go to the bathroom right now. Little Johnny gets up to leave the room and says, "Teacher, teacher, urinate, but if you had bigger tits you'd be a ten."

Charged Up

Q: What did little Johnny's mother do when she caught him zapping the other children with static electricity?
A: She grounded him.

Little Johnny to Tinkle

Little Johnny says to his mother, "Mommy, I have to go and tinkle." The mother replies back, "Would you like Mommy to take you?" Little Johnny says, "No let grandma... her hand shakes!"