Classified Error

• (Monday) FOR SALE - R. D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Phone 555-0707 after 7 p.m. and ask for Mrs. Kelly who lives with him cheap.
• (Tuesday) NOTICE - We regret having erred in R. D. Jone's ad yesterday. It should have read: One sewing machine for sale. Cheap: 555-0707 and ask for Mrs. Kelly who lives with him after 7 p.m.
• (Wednesday) NOTICE - R. D. Jones has informed us that he has received several annoying telephone calls because of the error we made in his classified ad yesterday. His ad stands corrected as follows: FOR SALE - R. D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Cheap. Phone 555-0707 and ask Mrs. Kelly who loves with him.
• (Thursday) NOTICE - I, R. D. Jones, have NO sewing machine for sale. I SMASHED IT. Don't call 555-0707, as the telephone has been disconnected. I have NOT been carrying on with Mrs. Kelly. Until yesterday she was my housekeeper, but she quit."

Betty Crocker Passes

Did you hear that Betty Crocker passed away? The funeral is set at 4:50 for ten to fifteen minutes.

The Blonde Farmer!

A man is driving down a country road, when he spots a blonde farmer standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that the farmer is just standing there, doing nothing, looking at nothing.  The man gets out of the car, walks all the way out to the farmer and asks him, "Ah excuse me mister, but what are you doing?"  The farmer replies, "I'm trying to win a Nobel Prize."  "How?" asks the man, puzzled.  "Well, I heard they give the Nobel Prize to people who are out standing in their field!"