Careful What You Wish For

There was this mexican who was walking down a beach when he found a bottle containing a genie. He rubbed the bottle and the genie said, "I'll grant you one wish."
So the mexican says, Ok, I want to be white and surrounded by pussy."
The genie grants the mexicans wish… and turned him into a tampon.

Love Handles

One day as Monica Lewinsky was walking along the beach awaiting her Senate trial testimony, she came upon an ornate bottle that had washed up on shore. Curious, she picked it up, brushed off the sand, and lo and behold a genie popped out."Greetings, Miss Lewinsky," the genie said. "Since you have released me, I will grant you one wish." "Well," Monica replied, "I'm going to be on television a lot for a while, and I want to look my best. I wish you would get rid of these love handles." "Your wish is my command," said the genie. A wave of his hands, a puff of smoke...and her ears promptly fell off.

A Blonde's First Wish

A blonde finds a lamp with a genie inside. He says, "I will grant you three wishes." The blonde says, "For my first wish, I want my love handles to disappear." The genie replies, "Your wish is my command." Suddenly, the blonde exclaims, "Holy sh*t! What did you do with my ears?"