Stupid Quotes Around The World

These are supposedly actual quotes taken from around the world.

• "That race was all about competition." - David Coleman, ITV
• "And I can see the strong wind blowing the sun towards us." - Brian Johnson, BBC Radio 3
• Mark Goodier: What's the name of the company you work for? Listener: Mining and Engineering Services. Mark Goodier: So, what kind of work do they do; is it mining and engineering services? - BBC Radio 1
• "Marling - unbeaten in her three victories." Peter O'Sullivan, BBC2 TV
• " Both drivers are fundamentally wearing white helmets." James Hunt, BBC2 TV
• "A church spire nestling among the trees... there's probably a church there too." - Richie Benaud, BBC2 TV

News Headlines

 Lansing Residents Can Drop Off Trees.
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half.
New Vaccine May Contain Rabies.
Man Minus Ear Waives Hearing.
Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing.
Air Head Fired Steals Clock, Faces.
Time Prosecutor Releases Probe into Undersheriff.
Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumni.
Bank Drive-in Window Blocked by Board.

Real Headlines

These are actual newspaper headlines gathered from papers across the country.
Include your Children when Baking Cookies.
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says.
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers.
Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted.
Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case.
Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents.
Farmer Bill Dies in House.
Iraqi Head Seeks Arms.
Is There a Ring of Debris Around Uranus?