Doing the Right Thing

"Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady."
"Well, you have done the right thing son."
"But mom, I was sitting on daddy's lap!"

Mistakes

I told my dad that he should embrace his mistakes
He had tears in his eyes. Then he hugged my sister and me.

Ain't She Cute

Father: (at hospital looking through glass at newly arrived babies) "Kitchy kitchy koo. Look, she smiled... isn't she cute?"
Friend: "But your kid didn't smile."
Father: "I was talking about the nurse."