The Test!

A guy walks into a bar and rudely demands a shot of 12-yr old scotch. The bartender thinks "this guy doesn't know the difference," so he pours a shot of 2-year old scotch. The patron takes one sip and spits it out. He promptly hollers at the bartender "I said 12-year old scotch, you bozo!" Still unimpressed the bartender pours some 6-year old scotch. The patron takes a sip... same reaction. But the bartender still doesn't believe the patron knows the difference. So he pours a shot of 10-year old scotch. Again, same reaction from the patron. Finally, the bartender is convinced. He pours the patron a glass of 12-year-old scotch. The patron takes a sip and is most satisfied. All the while this has been going on, a drunk at the end of the bar has been watching. He slides a shot glass down the bar to the patron and  says: "Shay mishter, tashte this!" The patron obliges... he promptly spits it out. "That tastes like pee!," he shoots back at the drunk. The drunk replies: "It ish. Now how old am I?"

Radical Muslim in a Bar

A radical Muslim cleric walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What'll it be?" The cleric responds, "A gruesome puddle of your filthy infidel blood!"

Al's Beer Ordering

Joe walks into a bar. Joe's friend, Al, sits down next to him. Joe tells the bartender, "I'll take a large beer." The bartender says, "Do you want dry beer with no aftertaste, or brewed beer with aftertaste?" Joe thinks about this for a minute. "Ah, give me the brewed." So the bartender gives it to him and he chugs it. "No, no," says Al, "Think manly! I'll have a dry beer." The bartender goes to fix it. "Why the dry?" Joe asks. "Well," says Al, "that way you can have one sip, and since it has no aftertaste, you can keep on drinking and forget you just had one!"