Answering Machine - Prayer

Now I lay me down to sleep; Leave a message at the beep. If I die before I wake, remember to erase the tape.

Monty Python Answering Machine

English accent: Hello, you've reached the phone of Monty Python. I can't come to the phone right now because the witch has turned me into a newt! I'll call you back when I get better.

Answering Machine - Color Shirt

Please leave your name, phone number, the time you called, and your favorite color of shirts. We'll get back to you if we like the color.