Check The Oil

You might be a redneck if you've ever been pumping gas and another customer asks you to check his oil.

Takin Out The Trash

You might be a Redneck if... You think taking out the trash means taking your in-laws to a movie.

You Must Be A Redneck If

• You recycle your own toilet paper
• Your mom has to shave more times a month than your dad
• You see a bill board that says "Don't do crack" and it reminds you to pull up your pants.
• You stare at a carton of orange juice because it says "concentrate."
• Your bumper sticker reads: "One more Whore and We Get Gore."
• The nativity scene you set up in your yard at Christmas includes two pink flamingos and baby Jesus lying in a painted tire.
• Most of your teeth are on a chain around your neck.
• You hunt from your bedroom window.
• Your dad walks you to school because you're in the same grade.
• You refrigerate your food stamps.
• You use a 10 penny nail to pick your teeth after a night of road kill.
• You have ever dressed your child as a "Snot-rag" for Halloween.
• Your idea of a loaded dishwasher is getting your wife drunk.
• You and your spouse get divorced and you are still relatives.
• You go to your local ice cream store and order Copenhagen "sprinkles" on your cone.
• You know instinctively that red wine goes with opossum.
• You're always looking to find your Mother-in-Law's picture on the back of a milk carton!
• The officer that just pulled you over asks if "you have any I.D." and you respond "About whut?"
• You take a beer to a job interview.
• You are caught roll'n your trailer down the street to jump start the heater.
• When you finish eatin' your bologna you use the rind for dental floss.
• You go to Goodwill to meet women.
• You and your friends are putting an engine in a pickup, drinking beer, and the conversation is: Which county jail has the best food!