George W. Bush Eats Out

George W. Bush walks into a restaurant in Washington DC with his wife, Laura. The waiter approaches the table and asks for his order.
"I'll have your biggest, juiciest London Broil," answers the President.
"But sir, what about the mad cow?!!" asks the waiter.
"Oh," answers Dubya, "she'll order for herself."

That's Lazy

My son is so lazy he hates emptying the trash in the recycle bin on his computer.

Yo Mama - Skunk

Yo mama so nasty, a skunk smelled her butt and passed out.