Nobody's Fool

I know you are nobody's fool, but maybe someone will adopt you.

Blonde Mattress

Q: What do you call a hundred blondes stacked up on each other?
A: An air mattress.

Stupid Insults 11/31

• Gets his orders from another planet.
• Gets hypnotized on the de-spun section.
• Gets parity errors under load.
• Gives a lot of bull for somebody what ain't got no cattle.
• Goalie for the dart team.
• God might still use him for miracle practice.
• God's favorite target for lightning strikes.
• Goes with the flow... He's a bed wetter.
• Good at quantum tunneling but not much else.
• Got a life, but wasn't sure what to do with it.
• Got his brains as a stocking stuffer.
• Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching.
• Guillotining him would make only an aesthetic difference.
• Gyros are loose.
• Habits explainable if he was raised by wolves.
• Had a head crash.
• Half a bubble off plumb.
• Hard to distinguish from the tail end of a horse.
• Hard to tell if he has an ace up his sleeve or if the ace is missing from his deck altogether.
• Has a bus fault problem.
• Has a few wait states.
• Has a full six-pack but lacks the plastic thing to hold them together.
• Has a leak in his ceiling.
• Has a one-way ticket on the Disoriented Express.
• Has a pulse, but that's about all.
• Has a random memory fault.
• Has a slow clock.
• Has a sparse matrix.
• Has a two-bit operating system.