Blondes with TGIF on Shirts

Q: Why do blondes have TGIF on their shirts?
A: Tits Go In Front.

Leaving Early

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all work at the same office for a female boss who always goes home early. "Hey girls," says the brunette, "Let's go home early tomorrow. She'll never know." The next day, they all leave right after the boss does. The brunette gets some extra gardening done, the redhead goes to a bar, and the blonde goes home to find her husband having sex with the female boss! She quietly sneaks out of the house and returns at her normal time. "That was fun," says the brunette. "We should do it again sometime." "No way," says the blonde. "I almost got caught!"

A Blonde In Flight School

A blonde went to a flight school insisting she wanted to learn to fly.  As all the planes were currently in use, the owner agreed to instruct her by radio on how to pilot the solo helicopter.
He took her out, showed her how to start it and gave her the basics, and sent her on her way.  After she climbed 1000 feet, she radioed in.  "I'm doing great!  I love it!  The view is so beautiful and I'm starting to get the hang of this."
After 2000 feet, she radioed again, saying how easy it was to fly.  The instructor watched her climb over 3000 feet, and was beginning to worry that she hadn't radioed in.  
A few minutes later, he watched in horror as she crashed about half a mile away.  He ran over and pulled her from the wreckage. When he asked what happened, she said, "I don't know! Everything was going fine, but as I got higher, I was starting to get cold.  I can barely remember anything after I turned off the big fan!"