Letter Home From School

Dear Dad,
$chool i$ really great. I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying very hard. With all my $tuff, I $imply can't think of anything I need, $o if you would like, you can ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you.
Love, Your $on.

Dear Son, I kNOw that astroNOmy, ecoNOmics, and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh.
Love, Dad

Yo Mama - Steal

Yo mama so poor, when I visited her trailer, two cockroaches tripped me and a rat tried to steal my wallet.

Yo Mama - Bath

Yo mama so poor, when she went to take a bath, the roaches made her wait her turn.