Stupid Insults 3/31

• A medical mystery.
• A mental midget with the IQ of a fencepost.
• A mind as empty as the sleeping pill concession at a honeymoon hotel.
• A mind like wet tennis shoes... Makes squishy noises when running.
• A modest little person, with much to be modest about.
• A natural talent for finding subliminal messages in ice cubes.
• A Neanderthal brain in a Cro-Magnon body.
• A notch off the timing mark.
• A one-bit brain with a parity error.
• A pacifist out of necessity in a battle of wits.
• A photographic memory, but the lens cover is glued on.
• A prime candidate for natural deselection.
• A quart low.
• A return with no gosub.
• A room temperature IQ.
• A semitone flat on the high notes.
• A square with only three sides.
• A steering wheel / few bolts short of a Yugo.
• A teapot with a cracked lid.
• A titanic intellect... In a world full of icebergs.
• A vacuum-tube brain in a microchip world.
• A VGA card and a Herc monitor.
• A victim of retroactive birth control.
• A violin minus the bow.
• A walking argument for birth control.
• A wind-up clock without a key.
• About half smart.
• Afraid she'll void her warranty if she thinks too much.
• Airhead / bubble-brain.
• Aliens zapped him with stupidity ray -- twice.

Insult Collection #17

• I hear you are being accepted into an exclusive club because they need someone to snub.
• I heard you went to have your head examined, but the doctors found nothing there.
• Don't get me wrong. I`m not trying to make a monkey out of you. I can`t take the credit.
• This is no battle of wits between you and me. I never pick on an unarmed man.
• Look, don't go to a mind reader go to a palmist I know you've got a palm.
• Hey! I know what sign you were born under! RED LIGHT DISTRICT!
• I hear you were born on a farm. Any more in the litter?
• We think of you when we are lonely. Then we are content to be alone.
• Hey, how come even though you are still alive your parents are in mourning for you?
• I'd like to break the monotony where's your weakest point?
• The next time you shave, could you stand a little closer to the razor?
• I hear you are an officer. Your rank is -- just plain rank!
• You say you are a West Pointer, but you look like an Irish Setter.
• You are so fat that I hear you were arrested three times for jay-walking when all the time you were just standing on the corner waiting for the light to change.
• Whatever anyone says to you goes in one ear and out the other because nothing is blocking traffic.

Yo Mama - Reflection

Yo mama is so ugly her reflection quit.